You really coming over, don't trick.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
Randomize
