Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
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