From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
