Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize