dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
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