We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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