I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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