Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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