just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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