You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
