i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
