do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
