So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
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