So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
whose ass print is on the piano?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
