Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Randomize
