I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
