I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
You pole danced in your parka.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
