He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
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