Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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