New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
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