You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I bet he comes in French.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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