what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
