I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Randomize
