what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
