Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
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