D3 body, D1 cock
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
my god I love twenty year old dicks
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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