Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
