We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Randomize
