I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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