but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize