When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize
