you're like a bully in the Christmas story
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
