Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
I need to align my fucking chakras
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
