I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
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