therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
