hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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