real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
