So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
