Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
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