Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
