Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
It's never too late to be topless.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize
