Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
