Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
false alarm. still invincible.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
