i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
