Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
