Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
