I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
