Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Randomize
