How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
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