Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
