Buhtt sex?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize
